Let It Go & Transform It.

Dear College Girl,

I know you are wondering “what do I do with this pain?” Sometimes pain is so strong it impacts you physically, spiritually, and mentally. The pain can feel so strong that you feel as though someone is tormenting you every second of the day. As though pain demands to not be forgotten.

I experienced this too.

In this pain I asked and prayed, “what do I do with this? How do I make this go away and never come back?” The truth is you can’t just make your pain disappear. Pain is a portion of life. The real test of faith is your response. You have to allow it to rise to the surface, feel it, and find a way to transform it. As much as one may hate to feel what it is they are feeling, your avoidance will eventually catch up to you. Because energy does not die but transforms, it is up to you to decide where and how you want that pain to show up in your life. “Virginia, what did you do about?” you may ask. I chose to write, and write, and write. I chose to write until it was no longer about the problem and my pages turned into a mirror. In the mirror I saw a girl who needed to transform that pain into power—to use it to share and inspire. So, I continued to sing, write music, start a business, start a YouTube channel, joined a dance team, fulfilled my goal of finishing the cheer season, going to the gym, investing in my health, engaging with individuals who value spirituality as much as I did, and so much more.

Turning your pain into action is so vital because misfortune and problems are part of life. Life calls you to face pain, to call it out, and cast it away when it becomes overbearing. Often times, we forget that the most beautiful parts of life are birthed from pain—people, projects, cities, and ideas.

In no way am I saying it is easy. In fact, it can be difficult because we all have different capacities and tolerances. What may work for me may not work for you. Maybe you need more therapy, more rest, a phase of destruction, an era of rebellion…only you know what that is. No matter what you need as a method of healing, do not neglect community. As people, we have a habit of thinking people do not understand us or do not go through the same things we go through. We are also conditioned to believe that everyone is out here to hurt us, laugh at our downfalls, and enjoy our sorrows. However, good people still exist. While your neighbor does not need to understand what you go through, it does not hurt to have someone wipe your tears, lend a shoulder, or be an ear to you.

So College Girl, stay transformative.

Sincerely,

Pitra